In keeping with Havi Brooks’ latest (and I have to say, awesome) ritual of posting a personal ad each Sunday for all manner of things she needs, I am going to do the same.
I am looking for an Accountability Coach.
What is an Accountability Coach you ask? Well, let me tell you what I think it is.
First, some background. I need/want to lose weight. I’m tired of saying it. I’m tired of thinking it. I’m tired of having limited costume options and I’m tired of headaches, which I could probably cure if my structure wasn’t under the duress I’m placing on it.
I’m tired and I’m tired of being tired.
I have discovered I can lose weight if I pay attention. If I plan my meals and track my calorie intake and workouts it’s actually pretty easy.
So, of course I don’t do it.
Because it’s change and change is uncomfortable which in turn creates anxiety and resistance.
I need someone to be accountable to, to get me through that resistance to success.
I’ve tried working with a friend, but when you’re working on an uncomfortable change together what happens is that two weeks down the road, someone doesn’t call and then other doesn’t say anything because they’re actually glad they didn’t call because they ate a whole bag of Oreos and don’t want to tell anyone. I’ve also tried the friend that isn’t working on the same goal and two weeks down the road when I haven’t done the things I said I was going to the friend doesn’t take me to task in a nice non brow-beating way because that’s not how friends are with each other and the friend loves me no matter what I weigh.
I don’t need anyone to design a workout or an eating plan or any of that. I’m good with making the plans and doing the research. I’m just not good at executing the plan over time.
So, I’m looking for an Accountability Coach.
- I pay you a small amount (about $20 feels right to me) to check up on me weekly: review the goals from the previous week and make sure the goals are set for the next week. I think it would take 15-30 minutes weekly.
- Together we would come up with rewards for achieving my stated goals (like a pedicure!) and non-shaming punishments if I don’t (maybe I don’t get the computer for a day).
- I would also love it if we could also move into other areas where I could use some accountability like singing practice and laundry. I assume with the right person this would happen naturally.
Who this could be:
- You are probably a Virgo but I’m open to other astrological signs. (I jest! It’s just that writing that makes me laugh)
- Someone who’s just getting into being a coach or personal trainer and is looking for a client (albeit a somewhat unorthodox one).
- Someone who knows me and thinks they’re strong enough to face my resistance
- I’m open to surprises.
What I promise:
- To give you lots of practice at Resistance Whispering. What can I say, I produce resistance in industrial size quantities.
- Testimonials, tons of referrals, and perhaps a blog entry or two waxing eloquent about your awesomeness. Who doesn’t need that?
- My honesty. Even if I ate an entire tub of dill pickle dip.
I know my right person is reading this. If you think that’s you, leave me a comment. I’ll get your email address when you submit your comment and contact you directly.
What I don’t want is to be contacted by people that have a weight loss programme to sell. I don’t want to go the Jenny Craig, SureSlim, Weight Watchers, Dr. Bernstein, yada yada yada type routes. I know they work for some people. I guarantee you I’m not your right people.